6 ways to increase confidence in conversation

Do people usually ignore you when you want to say something? Does it bother you? Do you imagine that people around you miss you the moment you start a conversation, or worse, barely even notice your presence around them? Have these problems become an integral part of your life? Do you think it’s because of your low self-confidence in conversation?

Are you one of those who feel you have exciting ideas but no one takes you seriously? Do you often not even try to explain your meaning to the people around you, and are you always afraid that others will make fun of you?

Is the only way to get rid of this situation to erase the problem? Well, you’re mistaken. Speaking confidently is easier than you think. By applying these six more tricks, others will never force you to be silent.

1. Don’t try to sound smart.

It is entirely natural for someone to want to appear intelligent and clever. Many of us tend to appear as someone who is so-called and has something to say. But many people mistakenly think that to achieve this goal, they have to send a flood of incomprehensible terms and complex words, which this is the first time anyone will hear of, to the minds of their audience. But you will probably be surprised when you find out that, in reality, people like to be spoken to clearly and transparently.

Using literature that you are comfortable with will help you organize the fluid flow of your mind more easily. In this case, you will no longer worry about which fancy and complicated synonyms you should use for different words. Trying to pretend to be intelligent using complex and incomprehensible words does not get you to your goal. It causes you to stutter, become anxious and hesitant, or make speaking mistakes.

2. Use criticism as a springboard.

Almost no one enjoys being criticized. Criticism is usually unpleasant and annoying for all of us; in most cases, we consider it inappropriate. But if you intend to leave a lasting impression during the discussion, keep going when faced with the wrong words of others.

Suppose you don’t make the criticisms of others a personal issue. In that case, these criticisms allow you to advance the conversation. Many of you are critical of this statement and think that not facing the criticism of others personally is not so easy in practice. You may be correct, but fortunately, in this part of the article, I introduce a simple method that will turn you into a professional critic.

First of all, neutralize the tension. In many cases, instead of criticizing, the critic only intends to hide his insults under the guise of seemingly constructive criticism and thereby completely empty himself. In such a situation, it is better to empathize with your critic and understand him. For example, in his answer, use this phrase: “You are saying that… (continue your sentence, repeat his same criticism)”

In the second step, you must turn the threat into an opportunity. Continue your words like this: “I think I understand why you made such an impression; probably, I could not express my meaning clearly.” Using this method gives you another chance to develop your idea.

At the end, close the discussion with a simple thank you, with complete dignity. But here’s some friendly advice: You will need much self-control to come out of this stage proud. To express gratitude, use phrases like: “However, I appreciate your attention. It’s a good point; I’ll think about it.”

3. Use your voice

You must repeat yourself if your voice needs to be louder while speaking. These redundant repetitions are annoying and sometimes really annoying. Sometimes, you even repeat your words for the second time in a louder voice. However, you can still read from the face of your audience that they have not heard your comments yet, and this is the moment when you are paralyzed by anxiety and worry and will no longer be able to continue speaking.

A simple, practical exercise will help you deal with such situations: using a voice board. In this exercise, first assume that the distance between the listener and you is twice the distance. Then, adjust your volume to cover this hypothetical distance. Just be careful not to put too much space between you and the listener because it will look like you’re yelling at the listener. Achieving this skill requires a lot of practice, and it is better to practice with your family members and friends before reaching the whole craft and using it in official environments.

4. Have the posture of an influential person while speaking.

It is not a hidden secret and trick, but an obvious truth that others can understand your self-confidence through your posture. But despite the significant impact of body posture on a person’s sense of self, most people need to pay attention to this crucial point.

Amy Cuddy (Amy Cuddy) is one of the researchers who investigated this phenomenon and presented how it is effective in the form of one of her famous speeches at the TED conference. During his experiments, he asked a group of volunteers to adopt a powerful pose before conducting a stressful interview. To understand the difficulty of this interview, consider that the interviewer was an intimidating-looking man who could maintain a neutral and emotionless expression in any situation. Before the interview, the second group was asked to assume a weak posture (shoulders slumped, arms folded, head down, etc.).

After the interview, Cody took a sample of his volunteers’ saliva to check the level of hormones in each body. The results of the analysis of the samples indicated that the level of testosterone in the volunteers of the group that had a powerful pose had increased significantly. Testosterone is a hormone that helps you feel more robust when facing stressful situations. On the other hand, in the group that used weak posture, the amount of cortisol hormone increased significantly. Cortisol is a hormone that makes you more sensitive to environmental stress.

Observing such internal changes in the people of each of the two groups was exciting. The participants in this experiment used only one fake gesture. Still, this suggestion directly affected the participants’ self-awareness level. Therefore, I suggest using potent gestures, even if this method is unnatural and artificial.

5. Drink a sip of water.

Using strategy is a strategy for you, but you will find it very effective. Self-confidence is more of a mental concept, and physical factors are very little involved in its formation. However, a few biological factors can help you increase self-confidence and present your ideas to others. Drinking a sip of water is one of the few physical factors.

The human voice is a fantastic tool. If you can use this tool correctly, you will also develop tremendous speaking skills. But this tool, like any other, needs care and maintenance, so you should always carry a bottle of water. Human vocal cords dry out quickly, and their drying speed is faster under challenging situations, which results in a shaky and nervous voice in most cases. So, keep your vocal cords moist if you want not to lose your confidence while speaking and your agent does not vibrate.

6. Use body language while speaking.

Imagine you struggle to find the right word to convey a message. Still, suddenly, your mind stops, leaving you alone to feel stupid. It is a painful situation, and I am sure all of you are stuck in it. But say goodbye to those painful memories because you will meet two work assistants who will save you from this challenging situation from now on. In fact, these two assistants have always been with you. They stand by your side, and whenever you can’t find the right word, they help you overcome this crisis and convey your meaning easily to the audience.

Still need to understand? Yes, that’s right. Your hands are your best assistant while talking. Whenever you are trying to explain your small but complex ideas, and you can’t find the right words to describe them, use your hands. By using your hands, you can take over the other senses of your audience and bring the audience to a complete physical understanding of your message.

Now, you are ready to speak your thoughts once and for all.

It hurts so much to have your ideas ignored by others, a pain that only the impact of being hit by a ton of bricks can describe. Of course, this pain becomes more excruciating when your ideas are worth hearing.

Using these six secret tricks will give you a unique ability to become an outstanding figure in discussions with others. Imagine a world where everyone listens to your confident voice whenever you start speaking. Imagine a world where your listeners give you the appreciation and respect you deserve. Imagine a world where you no longer have to feel stupid or ridiculed for what you say under any circumstances. It’s a beautiful world.

If you want to put all these ideas into practice, try to apply these six points in your subsequent discussion. In this case, no one can ever force you to be silent.